This was really hard for me to pick considering my “favorite song” changes every week. One week I’ll have a song on repeat and the next week I’m obsessing over another one. Like this week was the killing moon by echo and the bunnymen and last week was Cosmic Love by Florence + The Machine. But I had Are You Here on repeat for months; That’s the longest I’ve ever felt the need to play a song over and over again. I just get it. I feel it, I never get tired of it and I think it’s absolutely beautiful.
When people I know at school say “it was nice to see you” or “nice seeing you” at the end of a conversation.
It’s so seemingly polite but it’s more than obvious than the break of day that you’re saying
"We’re not really friends. I want to end this conversation. Can I/you leave now?"
I’d actually prefer you say that because at least you’re being upfront rather than saying something so freaking formal to someone that’s your peer in hopes that I actually believe that you did in fact find it “nice to see me” when really you’re establishing distance between us.
For the past month I’ve been feeling uncharacteristically bubbly and…different.
Though I hate to admit it, you switched up the routine that was my boring everyday life
You listened to me and we joked and made faces watched the sun come up and back down again
and at the same time you made me slowly. lose. my mind.
I was miserable and I thought about you all the time
while you seemed to go on unaffected.
And I couldn’t go on like that.
It was fun but I have things I need to do too besides being crazy bipolar and having you dominate all my thoughts.
I have people that actually love and appreciate me
You weren’t….real. I mean…whatever we had going on..
I know that you can’t give me what I need, as much as I wish you could.
I know what I secretly and pathetically expected would come out of this thing was stupid.
It would be really stupid of me to make the same mistake twice and to keep hoping.
I used to be a stupid kid, and I’m not anymore.
It’s obvious you’ve moved on and don’t care. I’m overdue to do the same.
I will be okay and one day I will delete the pictures. One day I’ll be able to order a belgian waffle at the local IHOP and be able to watch Back to the Future 2 without feeling sick to my stomach and it won’t hurt anymore and you would’ve been just a silly memory.
And though it still stings, I don’t regret meeting you.
But I’m not going to try anymore.
So that’s it I guess.
I hope she makes you happy. I hope you get to do all the things that you always dreamed of and you have a good life.
- Taylor Swift sang a song about Kanye West stealing a microphone from her a year ago. Boo fucking hoo. But hey it was a nice switch from the same fucking song about drew, or joe or stephen that broke her heart or how she wishes she could live happily ever after.
- All the performances were very forgettable, that they actually became bad. (except florence+the machine because she is a goddess.)
- B.o.B. was jumping around like fucking Tigger during his performance. It just made me kind of dizzy.
- Lady Gaga winning 4 awards and being awesome.
- Justin Bieber forgot which side is left and which is right.
- Kanye closed the show *toast to all the assholes/douchebags* with breakdancing ballerinas. It was alright; Wasn’t really my cup of tea. Perhaps when its overplayed on the radio I’ll think differently, and then after that start to despise it when they begin to play it 6 times in 5 minutes.
God. The VMAs used to be so fucking awesome. Those days are over now I guess. After 2003, that was just done with. I still feel obligated to watch; But really if you didn’t see it you didn’t miss too much.